What follows is an "open letter to the real world" written weeks after February 29, my last day at work.
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Graceful Exit
an open letter to the real world
I promised myself to write an open letter to what is called the “real world” as I leave my job. The intention was clear – I want to defend my act of leaving. But as of this moment, I am not writing to justify my resignation, what I want is to be a testimony of the truth that each of my co-generation or co-era is or might be facing. I may not be able to speak of their thoughts, but I do have my opinions to share.
I am currently 21 years and 14 days old. Others who are of the same age are probably out-of-school due to financial problems, probably still in school, and/or probably working. Those who are still in school are still living the way they were living a year or two ago. They are still pursuing their specific goal – to graduate. Such speific goal serves as their means in achieving their dreams. Unlike those who are still in school, those who already stepped out of college are now being welcomed by what is called the “real world.” We are presented with lots of choices, which were not present when we were still students – choices, which made us think whether our dreams are worth dreaming.
I was already expecting this situation. I already had an idea that university life is different from life at work. The priorities of a student are (or might be) different from the priorities of a working person. But there's more to being in this quarterlife period than just the difficulty in adjusting from a university life to a corporate life.
It's not new to hear of someone who just had his first job and resigned after several months. You had heard of his stories at work, with which you could see that he was having fun. But you had also heard of his rants several months later, which brought his resignation. To help fresh graduates, there are books claiming they had formulated ways, steps and/or tips to suriviving in the “real world.” Read them, and you would assent to me when I said that all of them can be summarized in one word: COMPROMISE. Those who didn't stay long in their jobs probably didnt follow this advice.
A fresh graduate already knows of this fact. He knows that compromise is the price that he has to pay if he is to enter the real world. But knowing the importance of compromise is different from actually being in the situation when one already has to compromise. Corollarily, saying that one is willing to compromise is not tantamount to actually doing it. The reason for that matter is that a fresh graduate would not understand the sort of compromises that he has to make unless he understood the workings of the “real world.” He has to know the very foundation of the “real world;” why such world is created; why and how such world is lived. Unless the real world is understood, a fresh graduate would not know what he has to compromise.
The so called “real world” is called as such to signify that the sort of worlds other people are living are not real. Ask people from this “real world” to give examples of the “unreal world,” and they would give the worlds of writers (no matter how noble the intentions of writers for writing are) and of academicians. What sets the world/s of writers and academicians from the “real world” are not geographical but societal. When asked to describe the “real world,” people would say that it is the practical world – the kind of world that most people in this world are living. “Real world” is the kind of world where breads are baked, houses are built and money is created. It is the kind of world that provides men with basic necessities, which are the kind of things that would make men have physical death should they cease to exist.
If we would closely look at the issue, we would see that the problem stems not from mere lifestyle adjustments but from the very practicality of the so called “real world.” Fresh graduates like us would be shocked with the sort of changes the “real world” is imposing on us. We do not only have to change our body clocks, and image; we also have to change our priorities, beliefs, and worse, our personhood. Scary.
Change is inevitable. But it is not the “changes” that brought crisis to fresh graduates. It is the fact that fresh graduates have to change the way they view life. They had developed idealisms in college; they were full of energy; of life – and much of these, if not all, have to be relinquished as they enter the “real world.” It is not true that in college they were carefree; but they care less of what older people care about – working and earning to feed the family. They were more concerned with gathering the right knowledge and skills because they want to make significant contribution to the society.
It is not the case that college or university students think not of family. Of course, they do. But they are not pleased with mere earning. They understand that they are studying not to earn money, but to earn knowledge; that they are striving for excellence not to have a high-paying job someday, but to contribute to the continued pursuit for learning and excellence. And this is where the ideal world / practical world dichotomy starts. The “ideal world” is that which is lived by academicians, writers, and others who are focused more on the “enlargement of the self;” of self-growth, of self-authentication, of being in pursuit of excellence. The “practical world” is the “real world,” which is lived by men who are concerned, not with excellence, but with success. This world is that which feeds the needs of the body; while the former feeds the needs of the soul (or of the mind). The two worlds clash, even if they don't have to. The reason for this is that those who are living in the “real world” accuse those in the “ideal world” as too idealistic, while those in the “ideal” world accuse the former of being too practical.
And this is a fresh graduate's problem: we need to live in both worlds.
As a fresh graduate who had a taste of the “real world,” and who cannot leave the “ideal” world, I urge you, the people in the “real world,” to welcome us without changing who we actually were, to understand us and the fact that we are from a different world, and to help us bridge the gap between the two worlds. You do not need to change us and the way we view the world. Corollarily, we do not need to change your way of looking at the world. Our society needs us both. We have to destroy the dichotomy; and this has to be done by both worlds. In our world, we make ways. I hope you do too.
I hope that someday, there would be a decrease in fresh graduates who are being disillusioned into entering your world.
Goodbye! I am going back to my world.
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My next entry would talk about my journey into going back to my world, characterized by failure to claim my salary for the last month I served the company I used to work with, and by the typical problems "resignees" who used to hold company budget experience.
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